This is not how I thought my life would go. Things were meant to be easy. I was going to be “discovered.” Whirlwind adventures, amazing loves, fabulous friends. Coffee cups and scarves and studios.
Let’s just say it didn’t go according to plan. But what do I do now? I fashioned a little life for myself. A little life. A little singing, a little writing, a little traveling. But I want BIG! I want GIANT! I want FAST! I want NOW!
Distraction is a big problem. Something jumps in front of me and I have to look at it. I’m like a seven-year-old. I need to knuckle down. What a waste. Formulating a complete thought is not exactly something I’m overly familiar with. It’s not exactly a surprise that I’ve never followed anything through.
Maybe there’s too much to do. Maybe I need to do one thing and just DO IT. I have too many interests. There are things I can see myself doing: writing, singing, organizing, performing. But not just one. All. Has to be all.
It has to be all.